bureaucratic nightmares

1
The Bureau

The Bureau

When a bureaucratic mix-up results in a man losing his job, he heads straight to the Bureau of Identity Management to get things straightened out, but unfortunately for him the Bureau never acknowledges it’s made a mistake.

 

Author’s Note: This story doesn’t actually contain a transformation, but it’s pretty well inferred that one is coming for our poor narrator. This story more or less inspired by my deep dislike for bureaucracy and the headaches it causes.

“Sir, it clearly says here that you are female,” the woman said beaming at me with a smile so sickly-sweet that it made me want to puke.

“Do I look like a woman?”

Her smile lost just a little bit of its lustre. “I really can’t comment on your physical condition. If the form says you’re a woman, then as far as the bureau is concerned you are a woman.”

Dammit, I hated the Bureau of Identity Management! I tried to make my voice sound as calm and reasonable as I could manage. “There’s been some sort of mistake. I received a notice in the mail that my sex had been reclassified to female.”

“Oh, of course. Why didn’t you just say that to begin with?”

Bureaucrats! I shook my head and levelled my gaze on her. “I’ve been trying to for the last hour and a half!”

“One moment please. Let me take a look at your records. It says here that you submitted a request to have your gender reclassified.”

“That’s a mistake. I never submitted any request.”

“I’m afraid, sir, that the mistake is yours.”

“Yesterday, I got a notice from my employer that I’d been terminated. Apparently, they found it just a little suspicious that my sex didn’t match the government records! I’ve tried to be patient, but I’m at my wits end. Tell me how to fix this.”

She slipped a paper onto the desk and leaned in close. “You can try fighting this, but the bureau will never admit any wrong. You’re only other avenue will be to complete a 92-346B form requesting sex correction.”

I grabbed the paper and read it over. There was a whole lot of legalese, but it seemed to be exactly what I needed.

“Once you’ve completed the form you’ll need to take it to the Request Processing Division. I’ll transfer your name into the waiting queue.” She smiled pointing across the room.

“Do that.”

It took all of about ten minutes for me to finish filling out the form, but it took another thirty for them to finally call my name, again.

I walked up to the counter, slammed the paper down and let the girl on the other side do all the talking.

“Well, ma’am, it looks like everything here is in order. I’ll just need to see proof of identity.”

I whipped my id card out and waited quietly as she slid the form and the card into her scanner. “Thank you. It will be just a moment.”

“Really, it will be that fast?”

“Oh, no gene re-sequencing is a lengthy process. It will only a moment before you receive approval.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Why your request to have your physical sex corrected, of course! And look it’s been approved.”

“Wait, what? That can’t be right! You’ve made a mistake.”

“Oh no ma’am, the bureau doesn’t make mistakes. Have a nice day.”



The End

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As my other stories this is a work of fiction and as such any resemblance to real life individuals, events or locations is purely unintentional. Only my own site, Fictionmania, Bigcloset Topshelf, & tgstorytime.com have permission to host this story and my previous works unless I state otherwise.

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